Tapping Into Joy
It is always possible to experience more joy whether everything in your life is going great or if you feel like you’re currently swimming upstream. The trick is to consciously choose a mindset and experiences that help you tap into joyfulness.
Another important aspect of creating more joy in your life is to learn how to fully embrace joy when it arrives. When I was having a really hard and very anxious time after my parent’s divorce, I was afraid of joy. When I would feel really happy or joyful, I would be afraid to fully experience the positive emotions because I thought if leaned into them then something bad would happen. Happiness freaked me out which is a really sad place to be.
As humans, we think we’re protecting ourselves from experiencing negativity by worrying, but really all we are doing is spending time being uneasy and unhappy when we could be present and at peace. The other shoe will drop for all of us at some point in our lives and worrying won’t prevent that, so when things are going well we should savor them.
All emotions are temporary, so when you are feeling joyful it won’t last forever. And when you are feeling like shit that is absolutely temporary too. Feelings are constantly ebbing and flowing and the more comfortable we can get fully embracing the good feelings AND the bad feelings, the more fully alive we will be. Below are some ways I tap into joy in my daily life:
Feeling the joy of others. I love going to the beach and seeing little kids squeal with excitement as the water hits their feet or laughing while playing in the sand and chasing seagulls. Watching the pure joy on their faces makes me feel joyful and grateful for the simple pleasures in life.
Music and dancing. I love to start my day listening to songs that make me feel good. Bonus points if you have a solo dance party.
Focus on everything that’s going well. When we’re stressed or overwhelmed, it can be easy to mentally loop on all the things that are going “wrong” or causing us angst. Notice when you are doing this and then consciously choose to focus on everything that is going well and write it out. You’ll probably realize that so much more in your life is going right than wrong.
Make laughing with a friend or friends a weekly priority whether that’s via FaceTime or in person.
Try something new, preferably something that makes you a little uncomfortable. Go to your favorite restaurant alone, try standup paddle boarding, ask a friend you’ve lost touch with out to lunch, or jump in the ocean in the winter. Get outside of your comfort zone and you’ll feel more alive.
Consume joyful media. Choose TV shows or movies that you know will make you laugh. See if your favorite standup comedian is doing virtual shows.
Try a new recipe and engage all 5 of your senses while preparing it. Pick out colorful fresh foods, use your bare hands to mix up ingredients, pay attention to all of the different smells, taste and season as you go, play some great music and enjoy a nice glass of wine while you do it.
Come up with a mantra, tape it somewhere you’ll see it and repeat it as often as you can. For example, “Today, I will embrace joy everywhere I go.”
